Never Knew I Needed

Being single and clean from any flings and scandals makes me feel carefree. I used to think that having those can be fun once in a while. Although I'm not that kinda person naturally,but yeah,that kinda mentality. But somehow when I thought hard about it, it somehow ain't as good as it is. Yeah, it feels great, but just for a while. Just a while. I'm looking for the real thing. A real, secured relationship. Yeah, it does sound cliche I know, but that's just how it goes for me. I go the traditional way, of a guy liking a girl, and vice versa. And start having something real from there. No faking stuff. What matters is how we both construct the relationship, the good and the bad, go through with it together and everything.


It's hard to find a guy that I am super comfortable with and whom I can just be myself whenever I'm around him. A different kinda feeling when being with a guy you truly like. It's hard to express,really.Guy friends are different,obviously .So yeah, that's the reason why I'm stating it now I guess. So maybe the conclusion is that (well I've discovered this long enough to know that I still am like this,haha) it is quite difficult for me to simply like a guy just like that. Some girls can do it. Some don't. Well I think I'm in the "don't" area. Maybe that's just me. Scratch that, being a jual mahal and all. Far from it. I guess I really do take it seriously when it comes to this matter. It's about love. Come on. Love comes in different meanings,yes, but this love,a unique, indescribable feeling of being in love with a man who means the world to you. You can't get that in the streets. You can't get it anywhere on the go. But somehow when the it comes, it feels like the world is spinning around, it's like having this bizarre yet calming feeling to it.


There's no definition in being in love. It just falls into place once you've met someone who really makes you feel at ease, regardless of any situation in your life. Regardless. Experiencing love may be ugly and beautiful at the same time. But I do believe that love is just what it is, to each and everyone of us. It is how it is, it's supposed to be like "that", being different to all the couples in the world. You define your own kinda love, and it blends to just the both of you, and no one else matters. There's absolutely no need of you to justify your love to everyone else. They don't understand it like you do. And so, love is what it is.

As for now, I think being single is definitely a great feeling for me. No hopes, no expectations. Nothing. And that's how it's supposed to be for me now I guess.


It's easy to fall in love with someone. But it takes forever to know what love really,really means.